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 ARCHIVED TOPIC: Is there some need to discuss?


Please note this is an archived topic, so it is locked and unable to be replied to. You may, however, start a new topic and refer to this topic with a link: http://www.fiddlehangout.com/archive/53977

groundhogpeggy - Posted - 08/29/2020:  07:04:32


Is there some sort of inherent need to discuss music, or is it just me and my excessive yakkiness? I mean...I have a need to play, although many times throughout my life I've wanted to not have the need, or tried to ignore the need, because it has been very inconvenient to squeeze music into the busy world I've found myself drowning in so much. So...now....I guess sometimes I just feel like I'll go nuts if i don't discuss music stuff with somebody...although, at the same time, I dislike trying to talk about it much. What's up with that?
Sometimes I wonder if it all just exists to drive me personally crazy.

Maybe it's really a good thing that I don't know one single person who is interested at all...so I try not to bore people around me with it all...and I should just forget it myself and go on and direct more concentrated focus on the tangible things around me.

But ... that never works. Music seems to be my nemesis, here always to drive me crazy. And I think talking about it is just as bad. So I look online....who's talking music? But that's kinda got it's difficulties too.

ChickenMan - Posted - 08/29/2020:  07:23:23


What is it you want to talk about? Music's ability to elicit an emotional response? How music can make time seem elastic? Perhaps we could talk about why the drum circle is so universally reviled by those who do not possess a djimbe or a cowbell with which to participate, or why so many who do participate cannot keep a beat? laugh



 


Edited by - ChickenMan on 08/29/2020 07:23:35

DougD - Posted - 08/29/2020:  07:38:09


I've been involved with music professionally my whole life, and most discussions have just been about practical things. Is this a good key for your voice? Should this be a little faster here? Do you really want this high C in the bass part? Remember that bar 117 has 5 beats. Do you want a little more "point" on the kick drum? That sort of thing.
There's not much of that here, since we're not working on anything together. Its starting to seem that most discussion here is just chit chat or questions about what strings to use. I'm starting to lose interest, but partly because I don't play the fiddle much anymore either.

sbhikes2 - Posted - 08/29/2020:  07:41:54


It's a personal interest that brings me happiness. Talking about it, even online, is a positive social thing to do. Helping others and getting help in return. I do this not just with music but with talking about backpacking gear online. How much gear can you possibly ever buy? I have all the gear I need. I talk about backpacking gear to try to hold on to the moments when I was out there using it. It brings back the memories, the stories I've collected through my adventures. I always say the gear is the talisman of the activity. It's kind of similar for talking about music. It's a way to hold onto something that exists only in time, which is fleeting and can't be held onto.

Johnbow - Posted - 08/29/2020:  08:26:34


quote:

Originally posted by groundhogpeggy

Is there some sort of inherent need to discuss music, or is it just me and my excessive yakkiness? I mean...I have a need to play, although many times throughout my life I've wanted to not have the need, or tried to ignore the need, because it has been very inconvenient to squeeze music into the busy world I've found myself drowning in so much. So...now....I guess sometimes I just feel like I'll go nuts if i don't discuss music stuff with somebody...although, at the same time, I dislike trying to talk about it much. What's up with that?

Sometimes I wonder if it all just exists to drive me personally crazy.



Maybe it's really a good thing that I don't know one single person who is interested at all...so I try not to bore people around me with it all...and I should just forget it myself and go on and direct more concentrated focus on the tangible things around me.



But ... that never works. Music seems to be my nemesis, here always to drive me crazy. And I think talking about it is just as bad. So I look online....who's talking music? But that's kinda got it's difficulties too.






Seems to me you have a perfectly healthy desire to connect with like-minded people and to more fully immerse yourself in something that’s important to you.  It’s a shame you’re not physically surrounded by them. To have a couple of passionately interested jamming buddies is a great joy indeed. Sadly, I don’t have much of that at the moment either.



I will share that even in the very short time I’ve been involved with this forum, I’ve noticed that I play less.  Don’t really understand why...?

Earworm - Posted - 08/29/2020:  08:29:43


No, I get it. Having discussions like that make the intangible more tangible, and helps you check your reality. My husband has been writing songs since he was a teenager. A big part of his musical development was a friendship that he struck up with another singer/songwriter during that time, and they still work together. Sometimes his friend will come and spend long weekends at our house and they'll just hide out writing and recording, coming up for food, then disappearing again. Rob has become a good friend to both of us over the years, and it's partly through those discussions with him and/or my husband around those visits that I could conceptualize myself, not just as someone who plays music and does art, but as someone who is a musician and is an artist. It is important to make that leap, and I believe that that's made more possible through connections with others. There are a few other ways I've been able to have significant discussions too, but after a while it also becomes intertwined. The questions stirred by one discussion get answered or extended in another discussion. It's important to get beyond the how-to now and then and see yourself as part of the larger picture.

groundhogpeggy - Posted - 08/29/2020:  08:38:59


Yeah, I don't know. Any and all of the above. I remember back in the old days...lol...whoah, I guess you say that when you're gettin' old or something...but we had so many friends, and everybody had passions of one kind or another... but a lot of us would put our kids in the bed or on blankets on the floor...stoke the fire and put on a percolater on the woodstove and sit up all night talking about junk like that... how colors interact, the weirdness of chaos in physics or issues in hog farming or sometimes even music. I don't know. I'm not that into discussing strings, and all that...but I do miss talking with people about would this harmony or that be cool to do, or what do you think about this rhythmic element vs the other, etc. etc. etc. That kinda thing. I guess leaving all the friends and being up here where it's just always party time and nothing else matters...lol....that's pretty boring stuff to me. Of course music, as I said before, really gets in my way...seems I've never really had time for it and have sworn off of it many times, or attempted to but it always comes back to get me again. Sometimes I figure if I sold all the instruments (and I sure wouldn't get much...most of mine are cheapies) and just got it out of my world I could then focus on things without the constant music in my head, first place. Or I think I could sell all the instruments and buy a harmonica...play that thing no matter what...except I've tried to learn to play one just about my whole life and I can't seem to do a doggone thing on a harmonica...I've heard toddlers making better sounds out of them than what I can do.

groundhogpeggy - Posted - 08/29/2020:  08:41:40


Then I do love the fiddle most of all.

Humbled by this instrument - Posted - 08/29/2020:  09:22:42


So back about 1976 I ventured north up to our cabin seven miles from the Fraser River in British Columbia (we still used feet, miles back then and had one and two dollar bills, too!) I had long hair tied back, my guitar in its case, and a backpack on my back. I had taken a bus as far as Clinton and was hoping to catch a ride most of the thirty miles of dirt road to our homestead. As I was standing on the side of the road some good ol' boys began messing with me, calling me "faggot" and saying, "I'll cut your hair for you!" as they slowed down their pickup truck before spraying gravel and dust and rock all about me as they then sped off. I later learned these chaps worked at one of the ranches north of us. Nonetheless, by and by, some more good ol' boys came driving by, but as they slowed the biggest guy leaned out the window and said, "Can you play that thing?" as he eyed my guitar.





An hour or so later I climbed out of the back of their truck, wiped what I could of the dust off me, and I and the three guys headed into our homestead and greeted Grandpa and Mom, and as we all sat around the Ashley Automatic stove (it had turned cold and began raining), I pulled out my guitar and began playing and singing, "Branded Man" by Merle Haggard. I barely got through the song before one of the guys, Henry, excitedly said, "DON'T you go anywhere; we'll be back!"





Like there was anywhere for me to go.





A couple of hours later Grandpa came and pulled me away from working on the fence around the compound. Henry had brought his fiddle and one brother his guitar, another his mandolin. We played for hours. Every song Haggard wrote, some Willie, tunes I'd never heard but quickly learned to accompany (and I still play them that way today). Henry later brought me a horse to use. A horse!





These fine fellows were Blackfeet Indians who escaped the smallpox that killed thousands of their kin down south in Yellowstone. They dressed as cowboys, looked like cowboys, rode in the rodeos, and weren't too thrilled with my hair. I later learned that some "Hippies" had moved into the mountains and were stealing from folks, breaking into cabins which had been unlocked for decades, busting doors and windows and mirrors and so on. But they called me a "country hippie" and said that was "okay."





I soon cut my hair. Why not? Down in the states it meant you were a maverick or something; up there it meant something quite different.





But music--that's where we connected. And good thing I knew all these Haggard songs! Wow. I got to ride a horse all summer long.





 


Edited by - Humbled by this instrument on 08/29/2020 09:26:35

Hoodoo - Posted - 08/29/2020:  09:53:56


I spoke to a traditional fiddler a few weeks back for an interview (I work in the media), when I was finished, I asked him if he would nerd out with me about old ballads and fiddle tunes and so on - he was happy to oblige. Literally nobody cares about the little obsessions, like how I discovered a new note in a tune that I had never noticed before. The Internet is great for that kind of thing.

sbhikes2 - Posted - 08/29/2020:  09:58:09


quote:

Originally posted by groundhogpeggy

a lot of us would put our kids in the bed or on blankets on the floor...stoke the fire and put on a percolater on the woodstove and sit up all night talking about junk like that... how colors interact, the weirdness of chaos in physics or issues in hog farming or sometimes even music. I don't know. I'm not that into discussing strings, and all that...but I do miss talking with people about would this harmony or that be cool to do, or what do you think about this rhythmic element vs the other, etc. etc. etc.






Where I live people have taken the covid thing very seriously. I have been quarantined in my house since March. We all have. And we all wear masks around here.



Because of covid, we stopped having our weekly jams and Irish sessions back in March. But this summer we started doing them again. We wear masks, sit far apart, play outside either in a park or in somebody's front yard. A small group of us formed a smaller jam and play on the porch of a friend's house.



At one of these recent gatherings, my friend exclaimed something to the effect of, "It's so good to see all of you, my friends, real people. This has all been so lonely."



At another of these gatherings someone started talking about how afraid she felt about things happening in our country. It was like she broke a silence we all had and we all had a thoughtful conversation about it. I left later thinking that it was like the first thoughtful, "dangerous" conversation I had in real life with real people in a very long time. It filled some kind of void to speak truthfully about our worries.



At other recent gatherings we've talked more than we've played. This is very unlike us. We've always played more than we talk, to the point that some people think we are unfriendly. But we have done it that way because we all agree on the music, but we might not agree on other things, so if we stick to the music we are in harmony.



We have a need for social connection. A lot of people in this country don't know anybody near them that shares a common interest. So online we go to try to find the connection.

Brian Wood - Posted - 08/29/2020:  10:17:04


I don't text or have a facebook account. My only social media is here (and occasionally on Maestronet). Like Doug, I sometimes become less interested and drift away. Other times I find myself writing to the forum daily. I stopped posting here at all for about a year recently. I didn't think I would come back, but one day I did, for now.



In my case I don't think I need to discuss music specifically, so much as I enjoy pleasurable exchanges with people who seem like friends who have something (music) in common. I have wondered more than once what it would be like if all of us found ourselves together in the same room, how different our impressions of each other might be, especially if the rule to keep the discussion on fiddling disappeared. The forum is an example of how people can cooperate by focusing on a common interest while intentionally excluding distractions.


Edited by - Brian Wood on 08/29/2020 10:19:15

RichJ - Posted - 08/29/2020:  11:19:32


Isn't music a language of its own? If so, doesn't this mean it needs to be spoken, hopefully in communicating to others who will understand? Maybe this is what Peggy is taking about. Humans need to talk to one another, but when it comes to using the "language" of music things can get difficult because not everyone understands this language in the same way. Not sure if I'm making any sense here. Just attempting to see if we can get to what Peggy has brought up.

alaskafiddler - Posted - 08/29/2020:  11:25:16


I think it's pretty common to want to discuss what you enjoy... and can be quite informative to hear many others POVs on the subject.



I recently have been enjoying the videos and discussions from folks like Rick Beato, although different genre, relatable concepts, some interesting other aspects can apply to most music.

RichJ - Posted - 08/29/2020:  11:34:43


I wrote the above after spending the last couple of hours trying to learn a fiddle riff played by Pete McMahon's in his version of Grey Eagle. Still not sure I have it but even more uncertain of why I was trying to do this. Listening to endless repetition of a passage on the Slow Downer program. Thankfully the wife was well out of ear shot otherwise she would surely have dialed 911 to have the nutty husband taken away....Music!!!???

Humbled by this instrument - Posted - 08/29/2020:  13:26:07


quote:

Originally posted by Brian Wood

I don't text or have a facebook account. My only social media is here (and occasionally on Maestronet). Like Doug, I sometimes become less interested and drift away. Other times I find myself writing to the forum daily. I stopped posting here at all for about a year recently. I didn't think I would come back, but one day I did, for now.



In my case I don't think I need to discuss music specifically, so much as I enjoy pleasurable exchanges with people who seem like friends who have something (music) in common. I have wondered more than once what it would be like if all of us found ourselves together in the same room, how different our impressions of each other might be, especially if the rule to keep the discussion on fiddling disappeared. The forum is an example of how people can cooperate by focusing on a common interest while intentionally excluding distractions.



@Brian Wood



These fellows I mentioned...they shot bears and eagles on sight--Henry asked me if I'd ever been chased by a Griz; I told him no; he walked me out to the horse he'd loaned me and gently trailed his fingers over a long series of claw scars on the horse's flank, saying, "If you ever do get chased by one, you'll shoot 'em on sight, too!"--and the eagles, they claimed, could and would grab their children.  These fellows hunted anything out of season, took as much fish from the streams as they saw fit, had a provincial conceit I didn't, drank beer at all hours of the day and one absolutely was an alcoholic, drank as they drove, etc.   So they were fine, upstanding Americans living in Canada!  (Humour people, an attempt at humour--calm down....)



So they weren't exactly in line with what I believed or did, and we did chat a bit betwixt songs and tunes, but does anyone else notice a "magic" that accompanies many jams or sessions?  I've often been at a gig or a jam when one of my terrible, horrible migraines comes on, and by and by the music or magic just takes over and I'm not there; the pain's gone; and I'm just playing music in another realm.  



Then again, could be the drugs I take.






 

groundhogpeggy - Posted - 08/29/2020:  13:32:20


I know covid has really affected so many things and made stuff so difficult for people. It hasn't really done that much for me, though...moving up here 30 plus years ago did the same for me as what covid has generally done for most people...lol. Just lost a lot of community, spirit, music, etc., when we came up here. Besides husband, daughter & sil and grandson...all of which I'm so happy to be close to, there is nobody around that I've seen to talk to about anything...let alone music. There's just no communtiy, no interests, no spirit...yes, there is music, but I've tried all the jams and was in a BG band and still couldn't relate...tried...couldn't...just could not relate. Sometimes I just think back and realize how much we lost coming up here. Of course, I'm sure we'd probably have died by now staying where we were...the changing conditions affecting ours and community wide-spread poverty were pretty much circling the drain for just about anybody there who wasn't rich. And everybody pretty much scattered for survival. And we ended up here because I got lucky and found a job here. So here we are now...sometimes I think back and it all feels like nothing ever really happened except this place...lol...no community. Thank goodness the internet came along.

LukeF - Posted - 08/29/2020:  18:42:27


Gee Peggy, you paint a very gloomy picture of your community. If you don't mind saying, what town do you live?

Anyway, to answer your original question, I think humans have an inherent desire to share the joy they feel in their hearts. It's just human nature. I share the same desire to share, which is why I visit various music on-line forums like this one.

Take care.

farmerjones - Posted - 08/29/2020:  20:07:43


When two or more musicians come together and make music, something happens, as Billy intimated. Good or bad, it's adictive. One wants another taste. I've been chasing it since the first jam. Crazy?!? You Bet! Like any adiction, i guess, it's good to talk about it.

What covid did for musicians is criminal. Can't hug. Can't shake hands. Can't get close, to sing harmony. Just came from a jam tonight. Jam's been taking place for fifteen years. We're all getting older. I look around and see damaged folks. It breaks my heart. Can't hug. Can't pat a back or shoulder. Can't close the distance and comfort each other. People are getting resentful, and no place for civilzed people to vent. I better stop right here. Goodnight FHO. God Bless

Woodcutter - Posted - 08/30/2020:  04:27:11


quote:

Originally posted by farmerjones

When two or more musicians come together and make music, something happens, as Billy intimated. Good or bad, it's adictive. One wants another taste. I've been chasing it since the first jam. Crazy?!? You Bet! Like any adiction, i guess, it's good to talk about it.



What covid did for musicians is criminal. Can't hug. Can't shake hands. Can't get close, to sing harmony. Just came from a jam tonight. Jam's been taking place for fifteen years. We're all getting older. I look around and see damaged folks. It breaks my heart. Can't hug. Can't pat a back or shoulder. Can't close the distance and comfort each other. People are getting resentful, and no place for civilzed people to vent. I better stop right here. Goodnight FHO. God Bless






Hi ... my name is Woodcutter ... and I'm a music addict. Steve, you are so right about this being an addiction. But, IMO a healthy one.



But unlike the other addicts you know those of us in woodcuttin' country still hug, play in tight circles and pass around drinks. We know and accept that we may live a shorter life as a result but we aren't about to give up our quality of life because someone on the TV tells us we should. Cheers!

groundhogpeggy - Posted - 08/30/2020:  04:53:48


Luke we're not in any town, just in county up in the northern parts of KY. It's a petty weird place...lol...as far as I can tell. Mainly a party place where people like bad music and don't do much besides get drunk together.

groundhogpeggy - Posted - 08/30/2020:  05:33:21


Also...I've never seen such a collective of people well-armed, ar-15s...for several years they were planning on Ky seceding from the union...lol...which would be the first time, of course...but they were ready and just itching to be in on that. Now they just would love a civil war...apparently they haven't followed events in Syria and other countries dealing with civil war in modern times...anyone who would want that for their country has something unscrewed in their collective, twisted up heads.

Woodcutter - Posted - 08/30/2020:  08:34:58


quote:

Originally posted by groundhogpeggy

Also...I've never seen such a collective of people well-armed, ar-15s...for several years they were planning on Ky seceding from the union...lol...which would be the first time, of course...but they were ready and just itching to be in on that. Now they just would love a civil war...apparently they haven't followed events in Syria and other countries dealing with civil war in modern times...anyone who would want that for their country has something unscrewed in their collective, twisted up heads.






Peggy, have they actually told you they would just love a civil war or is that an assumption? I agree that a civil war would be horrific but I could understand them wanting to be prepared if someone else starts one.

groundhogpeggy - Posted - 08/30/2020:  09:35:57


Honestly, I know for a fact for years they wanted KY to secede...when I was in the BG band and hung around a lot of BG jams locally here, I felt like a broken record reminding so many people that if KY was hostile territory of the U.S., it would make for a very hard life here for numerous reasons. Anyway, these days I don't talk to as many people because I'm no longer in the band and don't go to jams and since there's no community to speak of, have very little actual speaking contact with anybody much. So, no I can't honestly say they want to start a civil war, but I can say they are gearing up and ready to get in on it...and seem eager and happy about it. Seem disturbingly eager for that to happen...in my view. Nobody flatout said it to me in those words, though...just what I think I see...I could be wrong...I realize that. But it seems to be the prevailing attitude from what I'm able to see.

groundhogpeggy - Posted - 08/31/2020:  04:49:15


Well it's not right for me to sit here and try to cherry pick features of individuals around to explain why I don't connect. I'm sure they are good folks and we just don't understand.  Let me just say, more accurately, we came up here and the culture was unexpectedly different and we just never figured out how to fit in. That's basically it...I steered off course in my posts above, trying to enumerate stuff that I'm using to "blame" or whatever...maybe a natural response when you don't fit in. I don't mean to bad mouth the people up here that I just don't understand, so bashing them isn't right to do.  It's been like the covid-type social isolation for us for the past 30 years...lol...seriously...we lost quite a bit by coming up here for monetary and probably other survival. I could sit here and try to think of clear examples over the past 30 years...and many come to mind when I try to think it out, but what good would that do?



Now as I watch the rest of the country and the whole world go through lonely isolation because of covid, it seems very sad to see it. With all the other junk going on, relentlessly, it seems, in the world...and no social relief or friendly get togethers, no music talk or other talk, no jams...it just seems hard to not feel sad.  Memories of the warmth and friendships long past seem like they never happened at this point.  The isolation is the only thing that seems real anymore.  We still have a lot of the old friends, but many have died and there's a lot of distance and a lot of problems trying to re-connect...though we have done it here and there.  Just seems even worse to watch it happening to everybody else now too.  People need other people. At least I've got husband and daughter's little crew.  Too many don't connect with their surroundings and have nobody at all.  That's just sad...


Edited by - groundhogpeggy on 08/31/2020 04:58:46

groundhogpeggy - Posted - 08/31/2020:  05:19:08


I guess I could continue on psychoanalyzing myself on a public music forum here...lol...and say i think my love/hate feelings for music come from the love of playing, the natural feeling of wanting to share and jam and play along with others, vs the inability to do that anymore, for these past 30 years, with smatters (that ain't a word, is it?) of attempts here and there that just didn't work for me much...but it seems music just points out the lack of any connections, the isolation. The Presonus has helped a bunch...but it ain't like real life, is it?



When we first came up here, and I couldn't find a place for us to live...hubby and daughter stayed behind while I started the job and had no place to go and no money yet...just started working...and I'd seek out landlords to try to rent from and most of them rejected me right away as a drug dealer...lol...it wasn't funny then, but I mean, I don't even take an aspirin ... I don't take anything...I don't even use toothpaste because of the drugs in it that bother me...but they wouldn't let us live there. When Mike finally convinced a landlady of a basement apartment, six months later, there was a tornado that came through and we opened up our apartment for the whole complex because we were in the basement...they ate our food and just made themselves at home and then reported us for having a cat. They all had cats...we had to find homes in a place where there was no animal shelters for seven dogs and five cats and our daughter gave up here animals and friends at the age of 10...she was constantly depressed and then we found a homeless cat...all the apartments had cats in the windows so we figured cats must be ok. But the people we helped in the tornado reported us, so the landlady explained since it was officially reported, we would get evicted from the complex. At the same time...we were hungry...the library wide meeting was talking about pear trees making a mess in a storm and I asked what was happening with the pears...like I wouldn't mind cleaning them up, because we could eat them. The whole place laughed me out of the room...they thought I was an idiot for thinking pear trees had pears...these were ornamental and I was an idiot.

This was our start to living up here.



Recently...we have these really bad guys living two doors down...drunk and fighting, cussing and shooting guns and our houses on this side of the road are about 10 ft away from each other, some of them. A lot of the neighbors have asked me to be the one to call the cops...they are afriad of these guys. Ok...so I've been the one confronting them in the middle of the road, screaming matches...calling the cops, etc. Trust me, it's against my nature, bigtime, to scream at thugs in the middle of the road.  Mike has come out too...not a screamer either, but he saw when one of them wanted to shove me.  These neighbors are nice people and understandably afraid to get in on it...I do it for them. Are they my friends? No. They have other friends and I'm not included...just a neighbor. I've helped them with their goats and chickens and other stuff...Mike has too...but we aren't among their friends...just "nice neighbors" is all we are. I don't mean to sound like I'm whining here...lol...the fiddle can do that much better...I'm jsut saying...somehow we've never made contact...I don't understand why...but yeah...what's the name of that book...Stranger in a Strange Land???? That sorta describes it for us here. Ain't been easy. But at this point it's been half of our lives.  Watching it all around makes it hard not to feel sad.


Edited by - groundhogpeggy on 08/31/2020 05:22:54

ChickenMan - Posted - 08/31/2020:  07:48:27


One of my favorite books. Robert A Heinlein is the author.

Hoodoo - Posted - 09/01/2020:  13:06:27


quote:

Originally posted by groundhogpeggy

I guess I could continue on psychoanalyzing myself on a public music forum here...lol...and say i think my love/hate feelings for music come from the love of playing, the natural feeling of wanting to share and jam and play along with others, vs the inability to do that anymore, for these past 30 years, with smatters (that ain't a word, is it?) of attempts here and there that just didn't work for me much...but it seems music just points out the lack of any connections, the isolation. The Presonus has helped a bunch...but it ain't like real life, is it?



When we first came up here, and I couldn't find a place for us to live...hubby and daughter stayed behind while I started the job and had no place to go and no money yet...just started working...and I'd seek out landlords to try to rent from and most of them rejected me right away as a drug dealer...lol...it wasn't funny then, but I mean, I don't even take an aspirin ... I don't take anything...I don't even use toothpaste because of the drugs in it that bother me...but they wouldn't let us live there. When Mike finally convinced a landlady of a basement apartment, six months later, there was a tornado that came through and we opened up our apartment for the whole complex because we were in the basement...they ate our food and just made themselves at home and then reported us for having a cat. They all had cats...we had to find homes in a place where there was no animal shelters for seven dogs and five cats and our daughter gave up here animals and friends at the age of 10...she was constantly depressed and then we found a homeless cat...all the apartments had cats in the windows so we figured cats must be ok. But the people we helped in the tornado reported us, so the landlady explained since it was officially reported, we would get evicted from the complex. At the same time...we were hungry...the library wide meeting was talking about pear trees making a mess in a storm and I asked what was happening with the pears...like I wouldn't mind cleaning them up, because we could eat them. The whole place laughed me out of the room...they thought I was an idiot for thinking pear trees had pears...these were ornamental and I was an idiot.

This was our start to living up here.



Recently...we have these really bad guys living two doors down...drunk and fighting, cussing and shooting guns and our houses on this side of the road are about 10 ft away from each other, some of them. A lot of the neighbors have asked me to be the one to call the cops...they are afriad of these guys. Ok...so I've been the one confronting them in the middle of the road, screaming matches...calling the cops, etc. Trust me, it's against my nature, bigtime, to scream at thugs in the middle of the road.  Mike has come out too...not a screamer either, but he saw when one of them wanted to shove me.  These neighbors are nice people and understandably afraid to get in on it...I do it for them. Are they my friends? No. They have other friends and I'm not included...just a neighbor. I've helped them with their goats and chickens and other stuff...Mike has too...but we aren't among their friends...just "nice neighbors" is all we are. I don't mean to sound like I'm whining here...lol...the fiddle can do that much better...I'm jsut saying...somehow we've never made contact...I don't understand why...but yeah...what's the name of that book...Stranger in a Strange Land???? That sorta describes it for us here. Ain't been easy. But at this point it's been half of our lives.  Watching it all around makes it hard not to feel sad.






So I just learned that Pear Trees don't produce pears. 

groundhogpeggy - Posted - 09/01/2020:  13:10:25


Lol...wish you could've been there at that meeting with me, Hoodoo! It sure was the first i ever heard of a pearless pear tree...what kinda stupid thing is that?

LukeF - Posted - 09/01/2020:  13:32:17


Peggy:

I feel your pain. Have you thought about moving?

sbhikes2 - Posted - 09/01/2020:  18:46:51


monetary and probably other survival



You say you moved where you did for monetary and other survival. I've always wondering how on earth anybody survives or has any money in rural areas. What does anybody do for a job in a rural area? I live in a small city and work at a university. It's a good job. Rent usually eats up any money I make though. Seems you can either live where there are no jobs and rent will eat all your money or you can live where there are good jobs and rent will eat all your money.

farmerjones - Posted - 09/01/2020:  20:25:41


quote:

Originally posted by sbhikes2

What does anybody do for a job in a rural area?






Agraculture mostly. 



I believe Peggy is a chemist?

old cowboy - Posted - 09/02/2020:  01:15:00


I agree with woodcutter. Too old to stop living and enjoying life just because some pretty boy reading a teleprompter telling me I have to. Never realized how easy it would be to destroy the life we know. I just lost an uncle this week. They said it was covid 19 that killed him. He was 85 yrs old and less than 10% of his heart was working before he contacted covid. he was in the hospital for over 2 months. Alone! They would not allow wife or family in to see him. He requested that they bring in his favorite Bible. Said he did not want to die alone. Hospital would not allow it. so they had the hospital Chaplin bring him a new one. Just wasn't the same. Is this the way you want to die? Alone with no family around you? Seems pretty selfish to me.


Edited by - old cowboy on 09/02/2020 01:16:11

groundhogpeggy - Posted - 09/02/2020:  05:16:11


John, sorry to hear about your uncle. Sounds like an extra awful thing about covid besides the nature of the disease itself...then there is the all alone thing...dying alone and the family knowing their loved one is alone. Sorry you all went through that.

No I'm not a chemist...lol...that's funny. Where we lived was rich in culture and community, but poor monetarily. The longest job that ever lasted with me there was 2 years. I've done everything from tutoring foster kids in a big foster home, taking care of goats on a farm, cooking for people in various situations, traiining as a map technician and then having only several months of that work before it ended, playing music (yes sometimes for money but mainly for free), waiting tables, teaching the grammar parts of GED in a community organization, tutoring college kids in writing and research at the small college in town, tutoring reading for kids and adults, janitor in the music building at the small college in town, working in the library in the small college (which is what got me the connections when I applied for the job at the univ library up here that got us relocated). Most of these jobs were only minimum wage, some were below minimum wage and none were full time...although I was used to staying after I wasn't being paid just to help get the job done. Jobs just didn't pay and didn't last for more than a few months...I've probably forgotten about other jobs I'd had...I've had a bunch and I'm sure I can't remember them all. Same with hubby...he mainly did heavy manual labor jobs but ended up getting into GED teaching after breaking his body down...the GED grant was for people with Native American blood and of course there was never insurance or security for more than a few months with that, no sick leave or vacation or holiday leave and just not much of anything.

We traded mainly instead of buying stuff...traded in our guns for a car when the old truck got so bad...Mike had built it from margarine tub lids he used as gaskgets and whatever other junk was laying around...we got a car finally but traded in the guns we had had from family. People would trade back and forth with stuff because nobody had much money.

We lived poor...times with no water...had to carry it up the ridge by hand...other times with water we could haul up by hand in the 2 1/2 gallon bucket from the well...Mike drilled us the well and later we put in a pump and pipes and had running water. Then the scorpions would crawl up our drains and into the trailer...lol...creepy.

At times no electric hookup and of course no phones anywhere close, but we finally managed to get electricity hooked up too...always a big struggle. We heated with wood and always picked up coal throughout the year as we traveled back and forth to town...throw that coal on top of the wood fire going and you could open up the windows and have good heat and fresh air, which I miss...lol...can't have that with push button heat you pay a bill for now. I cooked on a fire I'd make outside on the ground in the summertime.

At times we'd have to stand in line for government handouts, and sometimes we qualified for foodstamps...I mean...this was everybody there...they've mainly all died or left. Never had new clothes of course...

I got the library job because of connections from working in the other library and came up by myself. Took showers in the workout center at the university and just had a struggle getting going. I came up here at 35 for 5.26 an hour, sick leave, vacation leave, retirement opportunity, and one of the main things, health insurance, for the first time for us. Finally after six months Mike and Annie could join me and we could have an apartment to live in and then Mike had to find a job...he found only grant GED jobs that don't pay and have no benefits and usually lay people off for a few months per year...so my job was the security, for years. Gradually his reputation grew as a GED teacher and he got more secure jobs and all of that. He was GED teacher of the year one year...that's a national title.

Well anyway...it was tough relocating. We've come a really long way, but I can't see how we'd ever had the money to move away from here...unless we went to the house in TN...but we have family in there, so can't go, besides I wouldn't be able to leave Annie and her husband and son. That's about all we have...just those guys...I couldn't leave them and they are stuck here for his work.

People laughed at us so much because we were amazed at things...heat and all the stuff...grocery stores, big ones, cappicino...that first Christmas I went wild (I yak freely, which I know is a mistake...lol) because they didn't take out the health insurance out of our checks and I was able to buy our daughter a Nintendo...I went around telling everybody I could do that, with joyful tears in my eyes...but they didn't understand my excitment...they just thought I was some goofy weirdo (which I admit I am..lol)...their kids always had that stuff...our daughter didn't get things for Christmas...this was a big deal.

Anyway...I'm going on too much here...we can't move...we're stuck right here. Lucky to have our pensions and not have to battle it out in the workplaces anymore. I realize how lucky we are now...I know we're now better off than so many people...and we've always tried to help anybody in anyway we could. I just miss having community and frienships.

Ceanadach - Posted - 09/02/2020:  07:13:17


Thanks to all the good folks who opened up in this chat. I really enjoy these fiddling conversations and keep returning here to the forums to stay engaged during these strange times.

Some years ago I bought one of a handful of violins made by an aged friend. I had no idea how to play it and had never even held one before. But I was very fond of the maker and wanted it mostly as a keepsake. It sat around for years until a couple of years ago I decided to try a few lessons as a retirement project. Now I’m really hooked. Just wish I’d started earlier before all the age-related obstacles started piling up.

This virtual community and all the YouTube videos in the world don’t make up for face-to-face learning, but I’m grateful nonetheless. I’m very much a beginner and pick up tidbits of useful information and encouragement from all of you. Thank you and keep the discussions coming!

groundhogpeggy - Posted - 09/02/2020:  16:23:15


Youtube might be the best thing most of us have right now. Lucky for us it's there.

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